• I Pillars of the Moon I

The Lovers New Moon Cycle, the vows we make to ourselves


Moon 8 of the 13 has us journeying with our hearts, the hawthorn tree and the marriage that is Beltane. Love is in the air, the flowers opening and vibrant, the birds frolicking, feathers dropping to the ground, green leafs adorning the Spring time trees, colour and life is everywhere right now. The spirit of the Green man's sword now released and aroused. Life floods out from within, bringing a surge of passion and eagerness to unite. All of life bursting with fertility, at this point in the Wheel of the Year the potential becomes conception. On May eve the sexuality of the Earth is at it's peak, the maiden Goddess has reached fullness. This is a sacred marriage of the Earth and Sky, a union re-enacted by humans for centuries!


Hawthorn for the Heart

Hawthorn has long been associated as heart medicine. And traditionally connected with the May day customs in the Northern Hemisphere as it blooms in May. Traditionally at this time we create beautiful crowns made from the blossoming Hawthorn branches and collect blossoms of nature's confetti to shower upon each other. The ancient spring festival of May day was named after the Greek Goddess Maia. The girl crowned May day Queen represents the Spring time Maiden Goddess. The May pole ceremony is symbolic of renewed life, fertility and Spring. The maypole represents the axis mundi around which the universe revolves; the tree stripped of changing foliage symbolises the changeless centre. The pole represents the phallus of God, the ribbons on the top representing the feminine principle. The union of the two coloured ribbons of red and white weaving and dancing together representing the Divine marriage, the sexual union of God and Goddess. I also have the idea however that the red and white ribbons symbolise the Upper and Lower world Queen's, the White Purity and Ovulation of Daytime and then the Red Blood of Menstruation, release and Night.

Both vital aspects for the balance of life.

The traditional Maypole is a fir tree (often the Yule tree saved and recycled to be the Maypole) traditions vary and some use Oak and others Pine. It was once customary to erect Hawthorn trees outside your lovers house and to decorate porches with Hawthorn on May day. Hawthorn is one of the best remedies for the heart, and circulation. An excellent remedy for high blood pressure, and all heart conditions. The flower essence of Hawthorn works on the heart chakra opening the heart and enhancing the expression of love. Apparently Faeries have meetings under Hawthorn trees!


Beltane Fire of Spring Passion

In the weeks leading up to Beltane we are preparing for the wedding, the marriage of masculine and feminine within us, that is now reflected around us in nature. With the sensual and life giving power that is Spring. The drive, the passion, the eagerness. The light of the Sun growing in length and power each day, blazing warmth down upon the Earth, beckoning the sleeping seeds to rouse from their nests, the seeds of the sun are rising to be seen. There is a youngness in the air, a playful promise of first love. This time can take us back to memories of first love. Oh and the thorns of that bittersweet connection, are difficult to forget. Love is a beautiful thing, but as with many of our young hearts there was plenty of bruises and let downs along the way. Our connection to the other always a mirror of our own connection with ourselves and the patterns we are re-creating from our upbringing and parental guidance. Why the broken heart? The answer is always within.


Commitment to Love Ourselves

When we get to Beltane on the 1st May we will be making vows to ourselves for the year, to be hung upon the Hawthorn tree until next year, when we can take them down and reassess them. Why the vow to ourselves? I asked my partner if we could make vows to each other this Beltane, and then changed it to have the vows made to ourselves, because I remembered every external relationship is a reflection to our inner world. The vow to the self is then mirrored in the relationship with the other, and thus this is how it will be for us this Beltane. It is a good time around this new moon to ponder over our commitments to ourselves, with a focus upon our creativity and passions in life. This time of year is all about starting new projects or getting things rolling, first gear and off we go, the accelerators on, the flow of yang fire behind our bums pushing our ideas uphill with glee. It is essential to use this energy wisely, focus and aim towards our passions, otherwise we may find ourselves lost in another's dream or even bedroom!


Learning to Love myself

I remember a few years ago, creating many not so ideal situations with lover after lover, it was like I was going round in circles. Until I realised these relationships were all reflecting something unresolved within me. I realised I was projecting love and passion outwardly so much onto others then not receiving the same response back, this is because I was not in love with myself. One day it hit me, what if I started to fancy myself as much as I fancy other people, what if I turned it all back onto me. That which I see in the other is a reflection of my own magnificence. I wasn't used to seeing myself in this way, so this was extremely difficult and of course it is here where the problems in relationships started. I didn't love myself, so how could another? They were mirroring back to me my inner process. I spent the next 18 months celibate. Focusing on myself, my own heart, loving my body and doing the things I loved most. I took myself out on date nights, I got myself flowers and chocolates, I would sit and adore the sun set alone, feeling oneness with all life, remembering that the beauty of the sunset is also showing me me. I did a shamanic journey to retrieve my lost feminine and masculine aspects, I did a ceremony for them both and married them within me. The child in me was so happy and free, mummy and daddy within in love. I started to pay attention to the different roles my different aspects have within, the feminine dancing, singing priestess, and the masculine organisation and communication genesis. When I was driving the car or reading a map I would thank Him for his service and when dreaming, visioning and dancing I would thank Her for her gifts. I got to the point of knowing them both so intimately I felt satisfied and whole. One day I mentioned to a sister of this feeling I had and that I didn't even desire anyone else right now and felt so complete. It was within weeks of making this statement that my beloved arrived in my life. A soul connection so old and deep we both felt it instantly. He had been on a very similar journey to me, the timing was perfect. We united, as two whole beings, and the Vesica Pisces of Divine union was formed.


Reclaiming the lost parts of ourselves,

reassembling the Kingdom

Isis and Nephthys, are both sides of the same coin. Sisters of upper and lower worlds in Ancient Egypt. Day and night. Light and dark. At this time of marriage and love, all of ourselves are seeking to be embodied now. Lilith and Eve. Sisters. As One. As half the world sleeps the other half wakes. As half the world dies the other half is born. Half the world in Autumn, half the world in Spring. We have been living in a veiled world of Eve's 'perfection' and hiding Lilith's snake undercover. Chasing the Sun and hiding the dark. Without the night, we would not be in balance. And so the earth must become in balance once again. We must meet our light, and our dark- welcome them home. Shame keeps Lilith hidden. But she is rising now, the veils are sliding off. We can try to grab them back on, but the wind blows stronger. Change must happen, and that means exposing that which has been hidden. What has been hidden in ourselves? When we were young we learnt that certain behaviours created reactions, judgement perhaps, anger even. What we were told as children to be acceptable behaviour or not frames who we become on the external. The parts that are seen as no good get buried inside the chambers of the underworld. They still exist, that's right we cannot delete them. As their job is then to poke their way through until we have the courage to engage with them and hopefully embody them- then coming into wholeness once more.


The Good Wife

The journey I have been on recently is realising how much of the Good Wife archetype I have been playing out. Cooking three meals a day, cleaning and loving. Nurturing and softening. A truly admirable woman. Oh my goodness though I have a strong Lilith and she is not particularly fond of being ignored. When I first moved to Glastonbury 2 years ago it was after years of travelling alone and getting to know ALL of who I am. The woman who arrived home was a shoeless, ecstatic unapologetic rebel, casting spells under the apple tree barefoot in my parents back garden in the middle of snowy Winter. Gradually as time has gone on, she has been pushed further and further inside (by me). Until recently she roared out again in outrage. So I have been asking the question, why did I hide her again? After finding her? Because my little girl didn't feel safe to be her. Because when I was younger I was told to be the older sister, to be a good girl and guide to others. Lilith in me was definitely not welcome as a young woman and so I become Eve. My sister on the other hand then took on the role of Lilith, dying her hair black and listening to heavy metal music, she even had a tarancula spider as her pet! So we can see how we both played out the different archetypes, my Lilith never got developed, her Eve didn't either. Until I went away travelling, I met with my inner Lilith. And now I love her deeply. She is as much a part of me as Eve, Lilith is my night, Eve is my day and bringing them both into balance again has been the greatest gift. Now in relationship I can see how she has been hidden in fear again, and I can speak to the girl in me who hid her away and beckon her back. Lilith is welcome here too. Turns out my partner quite likes her! It was my own fear that locked her back in a cage. When we love and accept all parts of ourselves it gives permission for the other to do that also, and all parts of ourselves are brought home to love. Until then we will keep attracting others who balance us out, who embody the characters we do not.


New Moon in Aries Live time Sky report

In the true live time sky and 13 sign astrology the New Moon will be in the constellation of Aries on Wednesday 23rd April at 3:25am GMT. Looking at the chart I can see there is still a kite aspect with the Black Moon Lilith in Pisces opposite Juno in Virgo. Juno to me is very much the symbol of the Good wife archetype I was talking of earlier and Black Moon Lilith obviously opposite shows this Upper world/ Lower world alignment I have been talking about above. That both Eve/Lilith Isis/Nephthys, the red and the white river are One, they come from the same source.

The Moon/Sun/Uranus aspect in Aries will bring fiery new beginnings and awakenings to these ancient teachings. Lilith has a lot to say, obviously she has been submerged in the underworld for some time. The story and Adam and Eve obviously has given her quite the bad rep. To me Lilith shows us ourselves, she brings enlightenment through the pathway of our shadows. In looking into these lost parts of ourselves we can find our way home to wholeness. By loving all discarded aspects we bring them into peace, and find ourselves in a place of ecstatic union within ourselves. This energy feels like a break free energy of awakening, how many of us are now seeking to break free from our cages? How many of us are seeking to dive deeper into the truths within ourselves and not looking externally in the media, but trusting our own deepest knowings?

This is a time of great awakening on planet earth. There is a fire roaring within us, and it is ready to rise, it is ready to roar, it is ready to move in the direction of HEART. And this my lovelies is where we will find our new earth- in our centre, in our hearts, we will find our Home in the Garden of Eden once more, where Lilith and Eve re-write their story, and we remember who they(we) truly represent.

This New Moon is a great time to come home to ourselves, light our own inner creative fire, begin sharing those inner passions and allow the force and drive of Aries fire to ignite them into a new reality.


Blessed be the Moon.

In love and Gratitude.


To finish today's blog I would like to celebrate to creative fire of my incredible sister Nalini Blossom as her Song Fire in Our Blood is totally perfect for this New Moon in Aries, bless you sister thank you...





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